“What pops into your mind when I say, ‘don’t think about a purple monkey’?” Adam said with a wry smile.

“Uh, a purple monkey,” replied Zach with a chuckle.

“That is how our minds work, Zach. The moment we tell ourselves to not do or think about any particular thing, is the moment that is all we think about and want to do. It’s in our nature. We cannot demand ourselves to stop doing any particular thing.”

“Then, how do I stop,” Zach began then stuttered trying to stifle the hopelessness he started to feel, “how do I change? I don’t want this stuff anymore.”

“I know, Zach,” said Adam with soft compassion, “I don’t want it for you. Our minds are interesting things. They are so powerful and capable, but they are so vulnerable too. The vulnerability comes in the fact that all things seek the path of least resistance. The power of the human mind comes in the fact that we are able to overcome that compulsion. We can willfully decide to do something different than what is easiest and most available. Right now, you are at the back end of years of abusing your body with all kinds of substances. Your body has been trained to go there, to desire it and begin to plot a course to get there.”

“That seems like a lot to get over, Adam.”

“Your’e not wrong,” the mentor replied with a chuckle, “but one of the first steps is to let go of the mentality that through sheer force of will, you will get over it. You are more humble than that right now, stay there.”

“Ok,” said Zach with a resolute exhale, “so where do I start?”

“Well, you like hiking, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Let’s say there’s a ridge you want to get to. By its height you know that it holds an epic view. But you’ve tried all the ready made paths that look like they lead to the top, but none of them do. Some of them even lead to really precarious situations. Blind falls, loose gravel on a steep grade, some to nasty quagmires. Some lead to a view that was good enough, but it was never all that you’d hoped for. Finally, you resolve to start a new path. The question is what will you have to do?”

Zach thought for a moment, “I guess I’d have to start bushwhacking and slowly working my way up.”

“Will that be easy?” Adam asked.

“Not at all,” replied Zach.

“Ok, let’s say you’re making your way up, slowly inching forward, how will those old paths look now that you’re tired and sweaty?”

“They’d probably look pretty good, honestly.”

“Understandable, but even if they lead where you don’t want to go?”

“Honestly, yeah.”

“So you take the old path and find the same old situation, what happens?”

“Regret and frustration, along with the shame of giving up on something way better.” Zach replied with resignation.

“Then, what do you do?”

“Try again, I guess.”

“Yeah, many actually give up, and just stick to the old paths. But, you say that you’ll keep going. Let’s say you get to the top, see the view, and now you have a path to get there. Will you take the other paths?”

“No. Why would I? They don’t lead to anything good and definitely don’t lead to that epic view.”

“What happens to the old paths, now that no one’s hiking them?”

“They probably become overgrown. Eventually you wont even see them.”

“That’s right, and that’s what the brain is like. You need to neglect the old paths and begin to form new ones to better places knowing that eventually the old paths will fade and what remains are only neural pathways to good places.

— An excerpt from my 30 Minute exercises